What a difference a year makes...

Catching up on 2 years is quite a daunting task so I just have to start from scratch 😉

When I first started this blog I was keeping track of so many things while working full time & caring for my boys! A lot has changed since then. I left my job in December of 2012 to become a stay at home mom - I was expecting our 3rd child and balancing a very hectic therapy load for our 2 special kiddos & couldn't handle it all while working part time anymore! Fast Forward to today, January 9th, 2014... I sit here thinking about the last few years, while nursing my beautiful 7 month old girl Cara 🎀

Cara Elayna Stathokostas was born June 5th, 2013 weighing in at a whopping 9lb 7oz of pure beauty! I am truly blessed & overjoyed that I have a daughter & a life long best friend ❤

2013 was a very exhausting year, being pregnant with 2 demanding young boys was rough! January we found out we were having a little girl - while sitting in a quaint little restaurant enjoying a peaceful brunch ... The suspense killed me as Gus opened up the little note from the ultrasound tech as we awaited our food! Of course I had to make a video & I burst into tears the second I could read the words, cutting off the video lol! We weren't going to find out & surprised our parents with the news. It was a very exciting day ☺

We celebrated many events in 2013, my moms 60th, my dads 65th, my "sprinkle", Kate's "sprinkle", Cara's birth & Baptism, Sean's birth, Brayden's 5th Birthday, Chase's 3rd Birthday...It was a very happy year for us and honestly things just kept looking up!

Chase is doing AMAZING in his PreSchool Disabled placement & he truly astonishes me every single day! He is talking SO much!!!

Cara is reaching all of her milestones so far & I think I can officially coin "Mama" as her first word :) she first said it at 5 months old! She cut her first tooth at 6.5 months old and her 2nd popped up right away ☺

October 2012 Update

Recap. I've been having a crazy few months so I haven't been on our group much & sadly miss all the fun things we do! I have 2 boys with Autism. Brayden is 4 today(happy birthday!!!) & Chase is 28 months old. Brayden is in a full day prek disabled program but it is actually considered a K-2nd disabled class this year due to his classmates ages. He is the youngest of 4 kids & has a teacher & 2 paras plus pull out ST & OT. Great ratio! He is doing nothing short of phenomenal! Chase is in Early Intervention receiving 1 hr OT & 5 hrs ABA/week plus 1x mo speech. He is also receiving 1x/week ST & 1x/week OT @ CSH :) I have him in a nursery school 2 school days a week while I work in order to prepare him for prek disabled in June when he turns 3! He struggles to communicate but we are going to try PECs bc he is starting to use pictures to communicate. He has probable apraxia as well which is causing the difficulty forming language & sounds for him.

In other news, we have had a really jam packed 4 years (time to update my blog lol) since October 7th, 2008 we have had 9 surgeries between the 4 of us. Started with my scheduled C when I had Bray 4 years ago today. 9/18/09 my husband & I got married & shortly after found out we were pregnant with Chase! In the last 3 years, my husband had knee surgery(meniscus). I had my 2nd scheduled csection & we welcomed Chase into the world. When we first started realizing Brayden might have an issue we took him to an audiologist & ended up getting tubes in his ears at 2 years old at CHOP. Following this - Chase needed surgery for an undescended testicle around 1 yo also done at CHOP. These last 2 years have been a whirlwind. My husband had a 2nd knee surgery on same knee, this time ACL.(he has had 4 knee surgeries on same knee in his lifetime. Then comes the worst night of our lives. On August 3rd, 2011, we found Brayden sleeping in a pool of blood at 11pm(literally, it was a horror scene from a movie). We flew up to MMC in long branch where we stayed for the next 5 days. He had a congenital defect called Meckyl's diverticulum & needed emergency surgery & a blood transfusion. It was the worst 36 hours of our lives. I carried my sons almost lifeless body into the ER after calling ahead to find no one there. He was surrounded by nurses & doctors & students bc it's a rare defect they don't see every day. He had part of his intestine removed & he is perfect now!! Following this crazy scarey time in our lives, things seemed to slow down briefly. Come April, I was having severe pains after eating only to find out my gallbladder wasn't functioning & I needed surgery(April, 2012). As I sit here telling you my story, I am laying in a hospital room with my husband for the 6th day. He had open heart surgery 1 week ago tomorrow. It has seriously been nothing short of an overwhelming 4 years.

What a year! And then some...

2010-11 Recap!

This is been quite a year for our family... we have grown in many ways from the hardships we have faced - but they are all just stepping stones hopefully leading us to a very rewarding future!

Where to start? Well... there is alot to mention, and frankly TMI! I'll make this as frank as possible :)

June '10 - Welcome Chase Christian Stathokostas! 6/14/10 9lb 3 oz *We Love You*





July '10 - Maternity Leave - Enjoying the summer with my boys <3

August '10 - Mommy gets a promotion @ Work! Return to work from Maternity leave

September '10 - Brayden started Beachwood Nursery School's Early Learning Center! Mommy went there when she was his age! He was just under 2 at the time.

October - Brayden turns 2! We had a birthday party to celebrate with our family & friends :)
Happy Halloween! Took the boys Trick or Treating (w/ Riley!) for the first time! Brayden was Nemo & Chase was Squirt! Chase was 4 months old :)

Riley & Brayden Trick or Treating!

November - GiGi was hospitalized (my grandma) after having surgery and months of recovery - it was a VERY scarey time for our family - lots of hospital visits & prayers. Thankfully, our prayers worked <3

Somewhere during "football" season my husband had knee surgery, after the year we have had, its easy to understand why I can't remember when this was :) All I know is he was able to get special seats at football games, LOL!

December - We went to visit Grandma on Christmas Day in the hospital, and spent Christmas with Aunts, Uncles & Cousins like we did growing up. It was a very nice Christmas - wished Grandma could have been home with us but we know she was in great hands!

January - Brayden started Early Intervention! After recommendations from his nursery school to have his hearing checked, and being sent to an Audiologist - they referred us to have an evaluation done to check his development. He was eligible to receive Early Intervention services and they started Occupational Therapy, Physical Therapy, & D.I. 1x/week each. We also we sent to an ENT, and we chose to go to CHOP in Philadelphia.

February - Chase's first Valentine's Day! Gus took me to NYC for an overnight stay at a beautiful hotel. We had a nice dinner and went out for a few drinks to enjoy some *us* time, since it is few and far between :)

<3 Me & My Husband NYC <3



March - Brayden gets tubes in his ears! We went to CHOP for Brayden's surgery, it was a quick 15 minute procedure (thank God) but it was the hardest thing (thus far) that we had to go through! Thankfully, they gave him some "giggle juice" before wheeling him away to knock him out, so he was relaxed and did not get upset. We of course couldn't help ourselves (I cried, I'm pretty sure I saw Gus shed a tear too).... It's tough to know your child is about to have surgery... even if it's a quick procedure. We were able to see him in recovery, which was very difficult for him. We left the hospital within an hour & he was back in school the very next day!  

Brayden Post - Op Ride Home!



April - Happy Easter! April was a fun month preparing for one of my best friends weddings! Enjoyed a bachelorette party this month with the girls - and as far as I can remember it was a smooth month at home with my babies! Those are few and far between in 2011 ;)

Me & the Bachelorette!



May - This is the Climax of the year if you will. Brayden's appointment with the Developmental Pediatrican was 5/3/11. On this day, he was diagnosed with Autism. It was a very bittersweet day. We went in to the appointment understanding that a diagnosis was a possibility, obviously hoping for the best, but prepared for the worst. This was the turning point of our lives. In a way, this was the best thing that every happened to us. After Brayden received this diagnosis, so many things changed. Our outlook on life, on the little things especially. Our boys mean the world to us, and we are dedicating our life to them (as most parents do) in hopes that they can have a happy and successful future.

After the diagnosis, Brayden's therapy with Early Intervention increased. He went from getting 3 hours a week, to 7. They changed his DI to 5 hours of Applied Behavioral Analysis/week. He also gained a new Therapist! His transformation from this point forward is absolutely MIND BOGGLING! He just amazes us every single day. Not a day goes by that I am not proud of my little boys. They are the most amazing gifts. We are so thankful for all of the hard work & effort that Brayden's therapists put into working with him on a daily basis. You can't put a price on what they have given us. They have given us HOPE for the future. They have given him LIGHT that we didn't get to see in such a way before. They have given us FAITH in God that he has chosen *US* to be blessed with this beautiful gift and they have given us STRENGTH to make it through even the toughest times when some may find it easier to just give up. We will always be indebted to them for all of their love & support :)

May was also a fun month for Gus & I and our friends because we got to celebrate the wedding of Luca & Jaime Del Guidice! What an amazing night 5/6/11 <3

Mr & Mrs Del Guidice <3



June - Our baby is 1!! Chase turned 1 on 6/14! We had a small group of family & friends over for pizza and cake on his actual birthday which fell on a Tuesday this year. He also had surgery this month - he had an undescended testicle & a hernia!! Poor little man, surgery #3 for my men this year! It was a longer procedure than Brayden's tubes - he was in for about 45 minutes - and once again, we were teary eyed when they took him away from us! I was really nervous for this surgery because of the location of the incisions and the healing. I didn't want him to injure himself in any way. We were able to leave the hospital about an hour after recovery, and he was running around the house that afternoon! Silly boys<3

Chase is 1!





Chase Pre-Op!

July - Brayden & Chase were finally Christened! on 7/24/11, together with our family & close friends, we had our boys baptised @ St Pius X Church in Forked River. Brayden's God Parents are my sister Kate and our friend, the boys' "Uncle" Jay Malley, and Chase's God Parents are my sister Meghan and our friend, the boys' "Uncle" Luca Del Guidice! We had a great time at the ceremony and than a BBQ at home afterwards :)

Brayden, Chase, Mommy Mommy & Pop Pop!

August - The dreaded August... Another life changing month... 8/2/11-8/3/11 was the worst 36 hours of our lives. Here goes nothing...

It was a typical Tuesday, I worked all day, Brayden was in school, and Chase was at my inlaws. Gus worked all day, and then went to his 2nd job at night(thank God, you'll know why if you don't already) I picked up dinner on the way home from getting the kids, everyone ate, and the kids were playing around the house! Typical day, right? Wrong. Changed a couple strange diapers of Brayden's and called the pediatrician because there seemed to be a problem, something didn't look right (after googling, of course!)  This happened between 6:30 and 7pm. The pediatrician advised me to bring him in to the office the next day if it happened again. Great! Didn't seem to be too alarming, I'm relieved! Back to play time.. bath time... bed time.. 9:30 I go to bed. 11:30pm I am awakened by my husband who just got home from his 2nd job. I can tell there is something wrong. At this time, neither of us know but one of our senses is telling both of us to go directly to Brayden's room. There he is, in the middle of a HORROR seen. Asleep. If you have a weak stomach, stop reading. There was blood (coagulated?) everywhere. He was in a pool of it... up his back, on the wall... pillows, blankets, sheets, clothes, covered. For those interested in knowing, he bled rectally, and thank GOD it is painless as far as we know! NEEDLESS TO SAY, I cleaned him up as fast as I could, and thankfully he woke up when I scooped him up in my arms and stripped his clothes off of him. The next thing I knew, I called the pediatrician on his cell phone and woke him up since he already knew what I filled him in on earlier - within minutes we had Chase's Aunt Jaime over the house and we were on the way to Monmouth Medical Center, where we would be staying for the next 4 1/2 days. It was about an hour before we got to the hospital. My head was down for the ENTIRE ride, except when I was checking on Brayden to make sure he was still awake. Thank God for DVD players in the car. He was white as a ghost from losing all of that blood... I called ahead while we were about 10 minutes away from the ER, just to let them know we were on the way. We get there, and no one is in site! I was panicking. Gus dropped Brayden and I off and went to park. I walked in, with Brayden, Curious George, & a lunch box full of bloody diapers for evidence - sure enough they couldn't WAIT to see them (doctors are gross!) I wanted to be prepared though... I don't know how I thought to grab them in the state of shock I was in, but I am so glad that I did. The next thing I know, we are rushed around a corner to a bed - a flock of nurses swarms in and out of his room - questions are flying, they rush bloodwork and find that his hemoglobin which should be something like 13 is at 5. something... he needs a blood transfusion. Devasating news. Now that we know this, we need to know what caused this to happen... he had to get a nuclear scan to check for their "assumption" which we "hoped" was correct. Meckl's Diverticulum. Sure enough, 2% of the poplulation have this congenital defect, of COURSE our son would have it! Thankfully, after emergency surgery on 8/3 and a small section of his small intestine removed, we never have to go through this again.... This day goes down in history for us as the worst day of our lives! 2nd to follow for me now is 12/15/02(really bad car accident) - I'd go through all of the physical pain and surgeries related to that again if it meant I would never have to see my babies suffer like this ever again... Worst week ever!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It has been a blessing in disguise since he has been healed from this surgery - his eating habits have improved a lot, still picky, but at least he is eating more now!

Brayden @ Monmouth Med Ctr

We celebrated my 27th birthday and Gus' 31st birthday this month as well.

September - This month was another turning point... we met with the Lacey School District through the summer for different evaluations for Brayden to see if he would be accepted into the Preschool Disabled Program. We found out they only offered a half day program and that was not what we were looking for for him. After his IEP meeting, I wrote a letter to the Special Ed Coordinator requesting that he be transfered out of district to a school that offers a full day program for children with special needs - and one day while I was at work, I got a phone call that he was APPROVED! This was a huge accomplishment, for Brayden, and for us. I felt that things were finally heading in the right direction and working out for us. After such a rough year, I really needed an easy transition for him into a school that would benefit him. We chose Island Heights Elementary School (not many local options given anyway, but we are VERY excited after meeting the teacher and observing the classroom!) Also, Daddy got a promotion @ Work! We also celebrated our 2 year wedding anniversary and went to Long Island for the 3rd year in a row :)

Happy 2 Years <3



That's all for now... :) they won't always be THIS long of a read! I had a lot of catching up to do! I highlighted the important segments in blue for those who don't feel like reading this entire post!

The Stathokostas Family
One day, we'll all be looking! ;)



My First Blog!

          This is my first blog! For a few months I have been trying to come up with a way to track my family's growth & development in order to have something to reflect on in the future. One of the main reasons I wanted to do this, is to track my older son's progress through Early Intervention. For those that are not familiar with our family backround, I will be posting a blog summarizing the steps leading up to Brayden's diagnosis (Autism). I decided to start this to keep my family and friends up to date so they can really see how far Brayden has come! I also wanted to use this to track our little guys development as well! Chase is 15 months old, and he just amazes us everyday. So far, we don't see any delays in his development, but we are monitoring him closely as Autism is hereditary. The BEST thing we did for our older son Brayden was to start him with Early Intervention therapies. It has been an incredibly hard year for us, but we have been rewarded so much along the way! Gus(my husband) and I are truly BLESSED to have been given these 2 gifts from God - they have made us view life in a completely different way.

Some Mothers Chosen By God

Most women become mothers by accident, some by choice, a few by social pressures and a couple by habit.

This year, nearly 100,000 women will become mothers of handicapped children.

Did you ever wonder how mothers of handicapped children are chosen?

Somehow, I visualize God hovering over earth selecting His instruments for propagation with great care and deliberation.

As He observes, He instructs His angels to make notes in a giant ledger.

"Armstrong, Beth, son. Patron saint, Matthew.

"Forrest, Marjorie, daughter. Patron saint, Cecelia.

"Rudledge, Carrie, twins. Patron saint… give her Gerard, He's used to profanity."

Finally, He passes a name to an angel and smiles, "Give her a handicapped child."

The angel is curious. "Why this one, God? She's so happy."

"Exactly," smiles God. "Could I give a handicapped child a mother who does not know laughter? That would be cruel."

"But has she patience?" asks the angel.

"I don't want her to have too much patience or she will drown in a sea of self-pity and despair. Once the shock and resentment wears off, she'll handle it."

"I watched her today. She has that feeling of self and independence that is so rare and so necessary in a mother. You see, the child I'm going to give her has his own world and that's not going to be easy."

"But Lord, I don't think she even believes in you."

God smiles. "No matter. I can fix that. This one is perfect. She has just enough selfishness."

The angel gasps, "Selfishness? Is that a virtue?"

God nods. "If she can't separate herself from the child occasionally, she'll never survive. Yes, here is a woman whom I will bless with a child who is less than perfect. She doesn't realize it yet, but she is to be envied. She will never take for granted a 'spoken word.' She will never consider a 'step' ordinary."

"When her child says 'Momma' for the first time, she will be present at a miracle and know it! When she describes a tree or sunset to her blind child, she will see it as few people ever see my creations."

"I will permit her to see clearly the things I see… ignorance, cruelty, prejudice… and allow her to rise above them. She will never be alone. I will be at her side every minute of every day of her life because she is doing my work as surely as she is here by my side."

"And what about her patron saint" asks the angel, his pen poised in mid-air.

God smiles. "A mirror will suffice."

~Written by Erma Bombeck